I don't know on which basis you people evaluate your new love affairs, but for me, you really can't tell if a guy is worth putting any effort for before you have been in bed together.
But this has nothing to do with sex.
Even though I'm not the type of girl that I would spend my lonely nights holding a big fluffy teddybear, dreaming about a man who would gently hold me as I fall asleep, I do believe in the power of touch.
When you spend time in bed for the first time with someone you like, there is two common scenarios of what might happen. First one is that it's nice. It's fun, it's okay. When the regular routine is looming ahead and it's time to start reading emails and hiding from deadlines, you get up like every morning after a good night of sleep: it would be nice to stay to bed, but you rather get up. The bedtime was fun but when it's done, you're just done with it. And this is a bad sign.
The other scenario is that it's just magical. Like, regardless if you actually sleep together or not, it's just amazing. You know, it's like you're creating your own little parallel universe where nothing else matters except for the skin contact. You just simply can't get up. That's the kind of chemistry that causes you being late from work, skipping parties, not answering phone calls or staying inside the house for 36 hours.
If there's no such physical obsession, it never works. I don't know if it's about pheromones, hormones, chemicals or some unexplained divine forces, but even though I would really like a guy, the sex would be superb, but there's just no gut feeling of "let's quit our jobs and move to Siberia so that we can stay in and cuddle for the rest of our lives", I know that sooner or later the thing will suck.
So last night I slept with my new date. It was a "let's lock the doors, skip our duties and forget the real world" kinda thing. But still I was early at the office this morning.
But I'm pretty sure it's just me enhancing my habits. And this thing might be worth, if not putting all in, then at least up the ante.
Post by Sally
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