How to manage when a friend is dating an idiot
Whether we like it or not, we all are making evaluations and ratings about all the people we meet based on their looks, manners and intelligence essence. We all can pretty easily measure, whether we think someone is attractive, smart, funny or delightful. It's rather easy to know whether we want to hang out with somebody or not. Also, we've all been in the situation where the date or a significant other of our friend doesn't really live up to our expectations.
But do we have the ability or permission to tell a friend whether to toss or take?
A few days ago I met a guy that has been hanging with a really good friend of mine. And it was an instant no-go. I could tell after a minute of being in the same pre-party that this guy has nothing to offer to this BFF of mine. He was not interesting nor funny, not any inspirational mind or intellectual challenge for my smart and thoughtful friend.
I told my friend about my initial reaction, and to my stunner, she had started to feel the same. This made me think about all the other times, when a new partner of a close friend of mine hasn't really convinced me of being the true match. Basically every time I have been suspicious about someone, the men or women have turned out to be weirdos, dullards, or simply not the right persons.
So, probably our close friends see us clearer than we see ourselves. They see through us. They see the minor body messages of hesitation that construe in their subconscious mind a message that the guy is not the right for us. They are not as blurred by crush or the haze of emotions.
Probably trusting a friend's gut might be more valid than trusting our own gut. After all, they are the safety net we'll be landing on whatever happens.
Post by Sally
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